Family is one of the most important things we have in this world. Family is so important to us, and we are committed to being a family that can keep growing and can create a legacy to last. A few months ago, Bekah wrote about our creation of a family foundation, based on the Rockefeller family method. This would be a great time to read it here.
Bekah and I both are a part of huge families, and now we are all one family. One aspect that has been really important to our family is the move to California. This blog is about the move to California and what this means for our family. We hope this story of our family resonates with you and helps you to consider what you want for your own family. If you read this blog or connect to this message, this can offer a recommitment to your family as well.
JESS
Living in Utah after both Bekah and I came out was difficult, both for us and for the kids. We were searching for a community that was a melting pot and would accept diversity. We had both been to San Diego, and knew that this was where we wanted to end up, but the move was still difficult. Utah had been home for both of us for our adult lives, and our kids had roots in Utah.
We knew that if we ended up in San Diego, one thing that would not be difficult was to recruit people to visit. It was difficult for us to leave our relationships behind with our friends, family members, and community members, but San Diego was seen as a great place to visit. We hoped our friends and family would visit often, and it worked. After living in San Diego for a year, we noticed that we were seeing family and friends more than we were when living in Salt Lake City. It was important for us to create a space where we can gather with loved ones, and continue to foster connections.
Aiden, my son, was stationed in San Diego when he joined the Marine Corps. We moved about 8 months after him with Ansleigh. Corbin and Acacia stayed in Utah with their dad. Austin stayed in Utah with his dad. Separating the kids was difficult, but it was what was best. We worked so hard to make sure to stay connected to our growing young adult children, and now 8 years later, we are able to see each other at least twice a year. Between visits, Google Hangouts and Facetimes have been necessary. Now that all children are adults and creating their own lives, it is even more important to create a space of connection, which is what our home renovation is designed for.
The space we are creating now in our home is designed to have a lot of intention of healing and connection. We believe that the world currently is in need of more places where you can take off your armor and be able to be vulnerable and open with family who doesn’t judge you. We have felt judged before, and our family space is meant to be safe for all.
Throughout this time in our world history, the support of family is important. When everyone’s lives slowed down, ours included, we were hungry for family connection. In March, Aiden and his girlfriend came to live with us for a month. Ansleigh moved back to San Diego and is now pursuing school full time while living here. We were able to go and see Corbin and Acacia over 4th of July. Aiden, Austin, and Austin’s girlfriend came to visit us for another week just now! With this injection of more family time, our ideas for the family are heightened. In the future, it would be our ultimate life experience for all of the grandkids to be raised together, and for the whole family to be in California.
Something we are really bummed about is that we weren’t able to have our annual family get together this year. It will be difficult to see Kennedy this year. Acacia had some friends who had weddings canceled. Austin and Acacia are both immuno-compromised, this is a difficult time for both of them. When these distance issues come up and we feel isolated and a massive space in the relationship that we can’t solve, there is an opportunity to see the silver lining. For people like my mother, Diane, we have had more video contact with her this year than we have had in-person or video ever before. For my Landmark group, after some difficulties, we were able to get Zoom up and running and now people living in rural areas can receive services like Landmark.
Bekah and I have had some clarity in business, and we were able to get some members of the family involved. We will have a blog talking about the new businesses that we have taken on during COVID later this month, we are so excited to share that with you! Bekah is fulfilling coaching needs for many businesses who need guidance during this time, and I am taking on a new venture fulfilling needs for special needs children in a distanced space.
If we have a commitment to connecting, COVID doesn’t have to be a reason to not connect. We can always find ways to connect, and commitment is the most important start to this. One thing that I am doing to rekindle that connection is to to carve out time to have more Zoom calls or Google Hangouts with the family to connect. I’m carving out time by building this time directly into my weekly schedule. It’s easier said than done, but I am making time for this priority of my life.
What’s one thing that you have gotten off track with your family? What one thing can you do to return to your commitment? Think about this, let’s start a dialogue. Bekah and I host an ongoing webinar: our flagship Foundation to Time Freedom coaching session. We will be answering exactly this question, and help you with tools to make the commitments you want. Be on the lookout for this, and join our mailing list to stay updated!
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